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In the midst of a dream about sleeping in and trying to hide from my mother to avoid having to admit that I'd gotten up late until I left...I woke up to find that I had slept in and couldn't manage to make my escape before she emerged from her room.

Damn it, why can't my good dreams be prophetic?


At least I got to work on time. And luckily, my boss has spent most of the past two days in meetings, so I've been left largely to my own devices.

Of course, since I speak decent English and he...does not, I remain as the hand through which he enacts his mad and grandiose schemes to attract the frankly excessive amounts of publicity (and sponsorship logos, we can't forget the sponsorship logos) that he seems to crave, for an event that, let's be blunt, currently has only the slightest chance of going off as scheduled without some sort of major disaster, and seems to lurch from milestone to milestone like a George Romero zombie. Not to mention that we spent nearly $4,000 on a contractor specifically so he could handle the publicity.

Sigh. We can't have everything.

And after all, if we weren't supposed to be working for people we'd rather have roasted over slow fires, they wouldn't have to pay us to do it.

I met the Board today - my volunteer boss' volunteer bosses, two kindly middle-aged Filipino ladies, and a distinguished Indian gent. They appear to be very impressed with my work here and my ability to write well- granted, after a year of my boss' frantic, disjointed ramblings, I must seem like Shakespeare.

I should be nicer to the fellow, honestly. And mostly, I am - he's likable enough. You all just get the stuff I can't say to his face. Like the part (about which I agreed with the Filipino ladies who suggested it while we were waiting for him), that all he really needs is to relax, and he won't be nearly so impossible.

Actually, they suggested we start spiking his tea with Ritalin or some such. I'm fairly certain they were joking. But it's surprisingly tempting, if I were that sort of person. Though there may be no help for his sieve-like memory - he is seventy, after all.

Of course, it's apparently his belief that if he relaxes, nobody else can or will take up his burdens, and the organisation will come to a crashing failure. He may be right. And, honestly, this cause and this place is his life in a truly scary fashion. He's here eleven or twelve hours a day, every day (except on weekends, where the Library building isn't open that long) - he has no wife or family that I know of, and there's no evidence he ever has, he has been working here since the organisation was founded fifteen-plus years ago...his devotion is both admirable and terrifying at the same time.

If I forget everything else I learn here, I will never forget the up-close-and-personal acquaintance with the quintessence of zealotry.

Thirteen days to go. 80 hours worth of work. Well...75, now.


Ahh, and lest we forget the actual news that I have.


The planned sale of our house to my "aunt" has more or less fallen through for various reasons: they couldn't really agree on a price, my mother wanted to stay anyway to do a better job of wrapping up her business (otherwise she would have left next weekend), and she could make another $20-30k by selling the house on the open market. We bought the place for about $160k, I think, and now its clones in this area are going for about $220-230k.

And we have lots of things to do with the potential profit - cover Ral's first year of school when, yaknow, she actually goes, as well as providing tidy little amounts for both my mother and I.

Sooo...this means I need to withdraw all the postings I made for this place, as I will be moving. Boo, but it's not as if I really have that much stuff, is it? As long as there's help. Or big, burly men who I can pay. One of the two.

This also means that I am no longer at all sure when either of them will be leaving. Mom will stay until...the start of October is her current guess. Ral may be going earlier, with the stepdad (who will be leaving in early September for business' sake), but I find it more likely that she will keep up her usual remora-like attachment to our mother and leave with her.

Granted, who knows? The lights of New York City are doubtless a significant lure to someone like her. Even in her current despondent cast of mind - she and her boytoy have apparently managed to resolve his inadequacies in her eyes, and are basically back together again.

Just in time to enforce several thousand miles worth of long-distance relationship.

Welcome to my world, Sis. Scorn it now, why don'tcha? :P

That aside...I think that if I _am_ going to be reversing roles in the Great Roommate Hunt of 2005 (thanks, Angie. :D), I would be best served leaving at either the end of August (unlikely as hell, but who knows?) or the end of September. Regardless of how long the house takes to sell. This means that I may be moving out before Mom leaves the country. It's really much more convenient for everyone this way.

Of course, it may still cause drama. But what else is new?

She is trying to aim me towards staying with one of her friends and paying them for room and board. No offense intended to your mother, vlosk, but I expect I will keep her as a last resort. Admittedly, this is a better fate than I have in mind for the prospect of living with Auntie Monica - an idea that should not be put aside lightly as much as thrown aside with great force.

Something about spending the next eight months arguing over the dinner table with fundies does not really appeal to me. Actually, something about replacing living with my mother, with living with somebody else to be dependent on and accountable to, some substitute she has picked, does not really appeal to me. I know she doesn't trust me to live on my own. But I have to let go of the apron strings eventually, or I'll end up strangling somebody with them.


-D.

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Comments

( Walk among 3 shadows — Cast a shadow )
vlosk
Aug. 21st, 2005 02:05 am (UTC)
part a): You'll survive; and a jobs a job afterall! 'sides, you have to admire your bosses drive and determination.

part b) Hmm... sounds like a sane-er plan than the previous, for many a reason. Moving, I'm sure we can help with... otherwise I hope you find a great place to live / keep us posted on the progress! Oh, and no-offense taken... I think my 'rents would drive you absolutely insane, so you're better off finding some badassed little bachelor suite or the like.
vlosk
Aug. 21st, 2005 02:06 am (UTC)
P.S. You're mom just called me to say that you _are_ coming tomorrow... like it or not! BWA HA Ha Ha ha ha!
paleshadow
Aug. 22nd, 2005 05:38 pm (UTC)
Indeed, and it rawked. Was even worth attending a Catholic church service, and I know full well how boring those are.

See ya next Sunday! Garbage awaits us!

-D.
( Walk among 3 shadows — Cast a shadow )